This is the way you left me,
I’m not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it’s forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.

No Happy Ending - Mika

Love seemed easier when I was young. Before the teenage and adult years. I remember my first love. I was 3, maybe 4. My best friend and I were in love with two twins that went to our daycare center. I loved Christian and she Patrick, or was it the other way around? We used to chase them on the playground. Since then it seems like love has gotten a little bit more complicated. I had a few other crushes during my first years in school, but the next big love came when I was 11 and discovered New kids on the Block, or NKOTB. I wrote in my journal, I still have it, something like “Today i fell in love. His name is Joe McIntyre”. It didn’t seem to matter at all that he was a huge pop star or that I was 11 and he 20, I just knew I was gonna marry him. My best friend (the one who had a crush on Patrick) was also in love with Joey, but not even that seemed to matter. It was a simple but real love. He was the perfect man, he never hurt me, and he was always there for me (on several posters in my bed room). My bubble cracked when I went to one of their concerts, in Globen, Stockholm. The place was full of screaming girls. It really shocked me, I just couldn’t understand why they screamed so much. And Joey and the other guys were just small little dots on the stage far away, I could barely hear what they sang. I dunno, that night I grew, and realized it was just an illusion and I’ve not loved another boy band member since. I miss that kind of uncomplicated love though. It seems like since my first kiss when I was 15, love has been a lot more complicated. I thought that maybe after the teen years stuff would make more sense, be more clear? But it just seems to be more intense. Relationships are deeper, lasts longer and hurt more. I miss the innocent childhood crushes. And even though I don’t want to, I’m really starting to believe that pretty much all men are jerks. I know women say that all the time, but I’m really starting to believe it (more about that in part 2). The problem is that I seem to always fall in love. Despite knowing that men are jerks I still fall, very easily, and it’s really tiring. So, since I seem to need to be in love, I’ve decided to direct my love towards Mika. For those of you who have missed who Mika is, I can inform y’all that he is the hottest, cutest, coolest, sexiest and most talented singer right now. And just like with Joey McIntyre, he doesn’t really exist (well he does, but not as a person I know), so he can never hurt me and can be all I want him to be. Plus, when I listen to his music, it makes me so happy. He writes about sometimes hard and sad things but always sings with a smile and convey so much positive energy . And he has the most amazing voice. So, as an attempt to go back to childhood innocence, from now on I will love Mika. I think life might be easier that way, and the rumours about him being gay or the fact that we will never meet, or even talk, does not change anything. It’s just how I want it.

Nothing can go wrong.

 

Also, I have a theory that there is at least one lolcat for any topic. To prove this I will from now on post a lolcat picture with my blogs, to add some extra wisdom and insight to the subject. Here’s one about love:

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